高中英语作文（评定一下）作文差,这是写的高考作文,大家给评个分（满分30）Hi,how is going ,I hear about your somrthng ,to my surprise ,you often smoking ,so I was worry about you,let me tell you somethingI know smoking ca

高中英语作文（评定一下）作文差,这是写的高考作文,大家给评个分（满分30）Hi,how is going ,I hear about your somrthng ,to my surprise ,you often smoking ,so I was worry about you,let me tell you somethingI know smoking ca
高中英语作文（评定一下）
作文差,这是写的高考作文,大家给评个分（满分30）
Hi,how is going ,I hear about your somrthng ,to my surprise ,you often smoking ,so I was worry about you,let me tell you something
I know smoking can make us more relax,but you know ,everything has two sides and smoking is not an exception,it has both advantages and disadvantages.
Many experts point out that smoking can make us unhealthy,for example,my father often smoking,and he is often illness ,so ,the more you smoking,the more you unhealthy .
As a result ,it is not difficult to draw a conclusion that somking have a lot of hams in our daily life,so I suggest you stop smoking.I know ,the first step always difficult,but if you hold on it,you will have a new life.
Well,good luck to you
最好能把错误找出来,要高考了,

高中英语作文（评定一下）作文差,这是写的高考作文,大家给评个分（满分30）Hi,how is going ,I hear about your somrthng ,to my surprise ,you often smoking ,so I was worry about you,let me tell you somethingI know smoking ca
1开头就错,再有爱心的老师也会当一回屠夫的!how is going?(没有主语)改为how is everything going?
2 I hear about your somrthng ,to my surprise ,you often smoking ,so I was worry about you,let me tell you something这个句子出现了5个错误（真是出师不利啊……）,第一I hear about you something ,to my surprise ,you often smoking中间的插入语尚且不考虑,既然about后面有you thing作为宾语,那么后面的you often smoking,作为什么成分呢?第二,you often smoking这句话只有主语,smoking是非谓语形式,那么这个句子没有谓语怎么行呢?第三,so I was worry about you中的时态不一致,既然前面第一句话用了how is everything going?很显然后面也要用一般现在时啊,怎么突然冒出来一般过去时,第四,一逗（号）到底表明这是一个“完整的句子”,然而一个完整的句子又怎么能有I,you 两个主语,hear ,smoking,tell三个谓语呢?第五,Let me tell you something
有一点中式英语的影子,老师不忍给你高分啊!所以这个句子改为
I hear about your that ,to my surprise ,you often smokes,so I worry about you!Let me tell you something
3 relax 是谓语形式relaxed,要改成非谓语形式,否则除了前面的make 是一个谓语,后面的relax又是一个主语啦
4 you know ,everything has two sides改为you know that everything has two sides,否则这个句子有两套句子主谓,一个是you know ,两一个是everything is,中间没有连接词是不行的
5 my father often smoking改为my father often smokes
6 is often illness中的illness是一个名词,是不能作为is 的表语的,形容词才能作为表语,所以ness去掉
7 so ,the more you smoking,the more you unhealthy 中的smoking改为smoke
8 somking have a lot of hams in our daily life,有三个错误,第一,somking什么词来着?应该是smoking吧,写单词都写错,老师就很有理由给你低分了,第二,smoking是一个动名词作为主语,谓语动词用单数,have改为has,第三somking have a lot of hams in our daily life,有一点中式英语的味道
改为somking is very halmful in our daily life
9 ,the first step always difficult,这个句子the first step是主语,表语是always difficult,那谓语哪去了,中间加一个is
10恕我直言,如果满分是30分,这篇文章估计是16分左右!语法错误太多了,如果语法错误少一点,至少可以拿到及格分18分